NOTHING.

I am not the woman

I have been, 

Nor am I fool enough 

to think about the woman I've become.

My flesh rests against the stones of the river floor.

But it is not my flesh, 

it is just skin.

My breath 

exits over the top of my jaw.

but it is not my breath,

it is the wind

that shakes loose

the Cedar's leaves.

I am nothing,

but everything...

When I am not the Woman I used to be.

MARIBEL.

93.2 Miles, A little under 1/2 tank of gas, and one daisy chain later lead us to the middle of nowhere where an Eerie, yet enchanting forest exist. 

The trees were black and burned;
the river was full of red mud.

MARIBEL, WI

IN THIS APARTMENT

In this apartment,

 we share our lives.

 It is not mine.

 It is not yours.

 It is not ours.

 It is a file in some rich man's cabinet down by the bay;

 but for now, it holds us. 

 Its walls have yet to trap me.

With you here..

 i feel free in this one bedroom

 as if i have rooms upon rooms to discover.

 You are all the rooms,

i've never had.

NOSTALGIA

Life – An existence that can be taken from us at any moment, forcing the ones around us to be trapped in a snow globe of nostalgia.

I have never seen death. I have never looked one who was dying in the eyes to wish them safe travels to the other side, wherever that side may be.  Recently a few close to me have experienced loss. I watch them closely as they shift their eyes the same as their bodies in their chairs. These gestures seem uneasy and I can almost sense the agony they must be feeling. To have loved and to have lost what once was.

I analyze every stutter and awkward pause. A silence that becomes so loud I can almost hear it. A song for those who left, to come home, exits into the air.

I placed Amy in an abandoned green house. It was gutted from its botanical life. I tried to paint a picture for her mind, so she could imagine a beauty and create what once existed. She asked many questions. The questions asked were formed from a fresh curiosity to devise a deeper understanding of her whereabouts during the shoot. The pictures I chose to keep were the ones where I saw her longing for what once was and what will never be again.

I am sorry if you have ever lost, but I have gained so much from you.